Our Breastfeeding Journey

I stopped breastfeeding my daughter earlier this month, and since this blog is partially educational and partially personally therapeutic, I wanted to take space this month to reflect on our journey so that I never forget it. I set out from the beginning to exclusively breastfeed her, and although I recognize that is not everyone’s goal or journey, it was important to me to do so. However, when she was first born, I was not anticipating it being as difficult as it was, and there were times I wasn’t sure if we would last past a few weeks. We ended up having a 14-month long nursing journey and I am so grateful. I am very much at peace with how our journey ended, and Morgan is thriving on solid foods which is such a relief (I do wish I could still just whip it out to soothe her when she takes a good toddler tumble though!)

Our weaning journey did not follow a specific schedule - and actually, our nursing journey in general was not on a schedule after about two months. I found all of the tracking apps to be incredibly overwhelming and I didn’t feel like I was as in-tune with my daughter as I needed to be because I was always trying to follow an external application. I know some people love them and they help them a lot, but here’s my invitation to you to give them up if they are overwhelming you. You don’t need them, and your baby would benefit from you using your energy to get to know them and their cues more than your rote following of an app. Our weaning journey happened pretty organically and gradually over the past few months where we dropped a feeding every few weeks until we were down to just our morning cuddle feeding. At the end, she was not getting much milk at all from it, and our last feeding was definitely sad for me, but it still felt like the right time. All these ‘lasts’ are hard for us mamas! Something that has made weaning a little easier is turning some of my breastmilk into keepsake jewelry that I will now have forever. I got a stackable birthstone ring from Mamma’s Liquid Love with Morgan’s birthstone and I can do the same for all future kids - it’s the sweetest little reminder of our journey every time I wear it :) The ordering process was so easy, and using code ALLYOWEN will get you 5% off at checkout if you get anything from them (they also have some really good sales throughout the year).

I want to share with you some of the things and people that made a positive impact on our journey, in case some of them might help you too. First of all, I took some breastfeeding courses ahead of time so that I felt knowledgeable on the topic, and I think that really helped me problem-solve and know when to ask for help. I really liked how comprehensive this one was, and I think it’s really reasonably priced - ALLY will get you 10% off. Karrie Locher has some great courses too. Additionally, I did a lot of research before I gave birth in order to find a competent lactation consultant; reaching out to her early helped put me on her radar so that when I had my baby, it was a little easier to get on her schedule. If you’re in the southern NH or north-central MA areas, I would highly recommend Kaitlyn McElroy of Latched On Mama. She also helped me pick a good pump and learn the features of it ahead of time so when it came time to introduce pumping, I was already familiar with the pump - I used Spectra and Pumpables, and loved both. One last thing I did to prepare for our breastfeeding journey ahead of time was collect colostrum. I noticed that I started producing this liquid gold around 35 weeks of pregnancy and I started collecting in these syringes (I found them to be more practical than the haakaa ones) every night after I showered. I was able to bring some to the hospital with me when I gave birth to supplement if needed (we didn’t need to, but I was ready with them in case a nurse suggested supplementing with formula until my milk came in - that was not going to be an option in my mind). I still have some of them stored to use when Morgan is sick or has a particularly rough bout of teething.

Once my daughter was born, she was diagnosed with oral restrictions (lip, tongue, and cheek ties) that were negatively impacting our ability to nurse successfully and pain-free. She was having difficulty gaining weight because she was working so hard at the breast, experienced lip blisters and frequent hiccups/gas from a poor latch, and I was in a lot of pain (although Silverettes helped IMMENSELY, and so did Motherlove nipple creams). After working with our lactation consultant to devise a plan, we did bodywork (which is why I received training in CFT) and got her ties released via laser at Lexington Smile Studio (we had a great experience there, but I also highly recommend Dr. Heidi Aarsonson of Boston Tongue Tie as well). I talked about our journey with her ties in this blog post last year.

Although getting her ties released turned our experience around and helped give her the skills to latch and extract milk properly, we also worked through a lot of body tension and I will forever be a cheerleader for all the supporting therapies to the success of oral tie releases and revisions. It’s why I added this work into my business! On my end, properly nourishing myself played a huge factor in my mental well-being throughout the hard early nursing days and also helped maintain my milk supply. Breastfeeding is taxing on the women’s body, just like pregnancy is, and mama needs to be adequately nourished in order to produce enough milk. I have some Instagram posts about this, but you can also contact me if you are interested in learning more about postpartum nourishment in general, or specific to breastfeeding.

I mentioned earlier that I had a couple of pumps to use as needed - I did not pump extra to have a ‘freezer stash’, but did pump when I was away from Morgan for extended periods of time that she needed a bottle during. Doing so helped communicate to my body that I still needed to be producing milk during that time, which helped maintain my milk supply. When she took a bottle, we used ones that I felt were the best options for her latch and oral motor development - Pigeon, Gulicola, Evenflo, or Lansinoh - they had a gradually slopped nipple that was most similar to her latch on the breast. Additionally, we never increased bottle nipple size; and you never should for breastfed babies, because your own nipple doesn’t change in flow rate. Going up in nipple flow rate for bottles can cause a bottle preference because babies get milk faster and don’t have to work as hard to get milk. For soothing, we also only ever used cylindrical pacifiers (like Dr. Brown’s or Advent) or the Ninni (ALLYO10 gets you 10% off) because those also activated similar muscles to a proper breastfeeding latch. I think making these two choices for external sources of nourishment and soothing helped to not sabotage our breastfeeding journey; she didn’t have the opportunity to develop a preference for bottles or pacifiers that were ‘easier’ than nursing, because they all worked the same oral musculature.

It took me a little bit of time to get comfortable breastfeeding around others or in public, but I got so sick of managing those huge breastfeeding covers (and I thought they were a waste of money) that I just bought a few staple pieces of nursing clothing to very easily and discretely nurse in public without flashing anyone. Some favorites included: Nursing Queen for formal events and everyday wear, Movemama, The Milky Tee, and Old Navy/Pact for more causal shirts/sweatshirts. I would like to say though, you don’t need an entirely separate wardrobe for nursing, and you don’t need to buy nursing specific clothes unless you want to. I felt like they helped improve my comfortability with nursing in public when my daughter needed to eat more than I needed to ‘hide’ and worry about not exposing myself. Plus, a lot of the options I had will serve purposes when I’m done nursing too because they’re so comfy!

Overall, I want this post to serve as encouragement to you if you also want to exclusively breastfeed - you CAN do it, you just might need some support. And that’s okay! It’s okay to ask for help, it’s okay to seek out resources, it’s okay to not buy formula, it’s okay to spend money investing in this journey for you and your baby. Whatever your infant feeding goals are, I hope you feel supported in them and that you are at peace with how your feeding journey unfolds so that you can enjoy this fleeting time with your baby! I also know that hearing my story of successfully breastfeeding for a little over a year might be triggering for some, but please know I don’t write this with any ill-intentions. I wish all mamas the best in their pregnancy and postpartum journeys xoxo

Some of the links in this post are affiliate links or coupon codes, meaning that I will make a small commission off your order if you purchase through any of the links, at no extra cost to you. I would never recommend anything I wouldn’t use with or feed to my own family, so you can trust that I have vetted these products for you :) My little family greatly appreciates your support!